Ben, Lori and Mei Kim True Blood

Here is the new copy for the spray can,
We make it a little funnier

Shake Well Before Using
Garlic and silver nitrate don’t mix properly so remember to always shake Bite Off Vampire Repellant before spraying it on aggressive vampires. If can is not shaken properly; there might be a 70% chance that it will explode onto the user instead of the vampire leaving him/her blind and defenseless. If buyer shakes the can five times, there would only be a 40% chance of that happening. If the buyer shakes anymore than five times, there might be a 90% chance that the can will explode. Literary.

Directions For Use
Bite Off Vampire Repellant may leave terrible stain on buyer’s clothing apparels not to mention a strong stench of garlic. It is advised that user should remove any garments before spraying themselves. Do remember that buyer’s skin may sting a little when Bite Off Vampire Repellant is applied. But for those who have sensitive skin, it may hurt so much that most buyers end up rolling in pain and agony. (Only 45% of our buyers’ complaint of such problems.) Bite Off Vampire Repellant will only last for 12 hours.

WARNING
THE PROPER USE OF VAMPIRE SHOULD REDUCE HUMAN INJURIES BUT IT IS NOT GUARNTEED. Results may vary. Remember to keep away from young children, aggressive old war veterans and friends’ who think spraying silver nitrate and garlic on other friend’s underwear is a funny thing to do.

CONTAINS
Silver nitrate, garlic concentrate, holy water, alcohol, silver distillates and a small hint of car freshener.